Pinkheart

Yesterday, I felt being put on a roller coaster ride again. The night before, I had a long chat with some SF Taiwanese friends on MSN for like three hours. The usually quiet and private Chinese writer also joined in the chat, that kind of surprised me.

Anyway, the chat was so funny, I really laughed out loud in my room. We talked about the movie, the characters, the lesbian world, star signs…the topics seemed endless. Everyone had a lot of fun but by 1am, we decided to call it a day. We can always continue the chat another time.

The next morning, I was absolutely shocked when I went to the writer's blog. This writer who calls herself 'Pinkheart' announced she's removing the blog…it'll be gone by the next day……WHAT?…I was stunned…dumbstruck…what happened?

One moment she was chatting and having so much fun with us, the next moment she gives us this unexpected news…what actually happened? She mentioned feeling guilty that the script was like a poison that had put all of us in a dream we didn't know how to extricate ourselves from. We were so into the SF dream, we just wanted the story, the characters to carry on to exist. She wanted us as well as herself to go back to our real lives, to wake up from this dream.

I do admit that since my craze over this movie, my life had turned topsy-turvy. I was so addicted to the blogs, the chats, I neglected my real life. I've not been reading the papers nor watching the television as I've been so busy just translating episode after episode of the script and chatting with the fans non-stop on MSN. Ya…I did lose my senses, my sense of direction, and yes, it was time to reflect on what I've been doing for the past one month and get my life back in order…sigh.

I was saddened by Pinkheart's decision and felt miserable the whole morning but I respected her decision for wanting to close the blog, whatever the reasons may be. Then I composed my thoughts and wrote her a note in Chinese. I think the last time I wrote a Chinese letter was probably more than 20 years ago! I took more than an hour just to write a short letter, telling her I do agree, I must wake up from this dream or nightmare of mine. The cyberworld really can be quite a scary place if we don't know how to manage our time and over-indulge in it. Now I can understand how some people are so gullible as to get conned by cyber crooks. I thanked her for all the fun she had brought us through her blog, the laughter, sadness, anger, that had intermingled on the blog.

Throughout the entire day, all the SF fans kept posting messages on the blog, trying to console the writer and persuade her to change her mind. She actually replied that she went to work with teary eyes, she also felt reluctant to end the blog…sigh…such an emotional person. All the more we felt for her. Everyone just kept shouting to her their support and understanding for her decision.

Finally, around 8+ in the night, she posted that the blog will stay…gee…what a relief. And she promised that she will not threaten to close the blog again without consulting us, the SF fans. She realised that the blog is now no longer hers alone, it is also ours.

I was out having dinner with Astroboy and Bobtail (correction, should be Cottontail)…again at Big-O, when I got the news…straight away I was exchanging messages with some of those SF friends online. When my two friends with me saw my contact list on my MSN, they got a shock. Wow! So many ah? Ya…I've got many SF friends now…and the list is still growing…hehe!

Friends, please do give me a nudge or knock on the head if I lose my sense of direction in life again. I've promised the writer I will try to manage this addiction of mine. But do help me if I'm lost again, ok?